Dad died 6 months ago yesterday. I had a dream that he was in yesterday morning.
The dream: I had car trouble and Dad is no longer there to help me so I have to figure it out myself. I had pulled out the radiator and needed to flush it out and refill it. I needed to see some writing on the top but needed more light to read it. I turned on the switch for light on the west side of the barn but it turned on a light on the south side. How did Dad have it wired? I was frustrated and asked him about it. He told me there is no way it would do that. I made a bet with him that I was right and if so he had to help me fix the car. If I was wrong, I'd fix it myself. He flipped the switch and the light turned on at the south side of the barn. He looked at it and said that is how it is supposed to work. What? Since when? No matter, I had to fix my car myself because he was not really there any more.
I told Mom about the dream and we both cried. Today we went to the bank and transferred some of the life insurance money from the checking account into a Certificate of Deposit. Mom is sometimes finally realizing that all that is there is hers - not Dad's anymore. Then she has a "thought" to run by me. It is always a different kind of thought but today it was turning one of the bedrooms into a "Girl" room just for the two of us and nobody else. As I ask questions trying to understand her random thoughts that are all over the place, I make her mad. She thinks I am saying that her ideas are no good. That is not my intention but that is how she takes it. Then we are frustrated with each other again. Distraction-Pizza is ready to come out of the oven.
Lately another one of Mom's 'thoughts' is to have me build a storage bench the entire width of the porch that she can put all her plants on. She has not wanted to even put her plants on the porch at all this year let alone get any new flowers. So--to distract her I decided to paint the treadle sewing machine table that is on the porch to spruce up the look. I then decided to fix and paint the broken hard wood rocker to match the table. While I'm at it I thought about also painting the glider love seat. One day while I was painting, Mom had a 'thought' that I should paint the glider, too. No problem - I can do that! Dad had built a box out of old pallet wood with a lot of staples and nails in it. I painted it also to use as a planter box so maybe Mom will use that instead having me build beyond my abilities for a place for plants. I finished the painting yesterday. Her next 'thought' is that I should paint the window frames. As I was scraping the frames and ledges, I discovered the caulking is so dried up and pulled away so it is not doing any good and needed to be redone. I bought caulk today and hope to do that tomorrow before I can paint. I know we are running out of nice weather before it gets too cold. This afternoon she 'thought' I should now paint the posts that hold up Derrick's deck and the wood that is on top of the block half wall that is the edge of her porch. That one I am not sure of yet!
Today I covered a cushion for the glider and plan to cover one for the rocker tomorrow. Here are a few pictures.
I am not as handy as I'd like to be and miss Dad's help and knowledge. I try.
A couple weeks ago my car battery finally died. It is the original battery from when the car was built. It is a 2011 model with 109,000 miles. I knew it was coming. I could not get a new battery and change it myself because of it's location and no vehicle to use to go to town to buy one anyway. Dad is not here to help me. He does not have a battery charger any longer. The only one on the farm is Derrick's and it is in his shop which I have been banned from stepping into and he has made it clear that he will not help me. I was not able to use any of their vehicles to jump start the car with and Mom's car battery is dead also. The only thing I had was the Massimo 4-wheeler. I didn't now if it would jump start the car and the guy from Orscheln's laughed when I asked and said "Good Luck". I do have my own set of jumper cables. I got out the car owners manual and followed the directions once I finally found the battery on the 4-wheeler. Oh, my goodness, it worked!! I got to Colby 1 hour before Great Western Tire closed on that Saturday. They did not have the correct battery on hand because it is under the driver wheel well instead of under the hood. The only place to get a different battery had closed 30 minutes ago but someone was still in the store and agreed to sell them a battery. So grateful! I asked it this battery will last as well as the old one did and they laughed at me also. I didn't think I was so funny. I said I'd be back in a couple weeks. I'm sure I'll need a tire fixed again soon.
Miss you, Daddy! I love you.
Rose
